Try as you might to avoid it, you will end up running around London doing last-minute Christmas shopping, and if you have the kids with you, it will be even more difficult and painful. But what will make it bearable is tracking down these indulgent festive treats from across town as you dash from shop to shop.
They’re delicious enough to keep the little’uns satisfied (and quiet) while you panic about trying to find suitable gifts. Merry Christmas, you.
No human can refuse fondue – its warm, gooey state makes your very stomach demand more. Kids in particular are obsessed with it, because it’s basically exceptionally delicious hook-a-duck. So grab your long stabbing-stick-slash-fork and dive right in.
Why kids will love it It’s imperative to shame the grown-ups when they lose their bread in the thick cheese gloop. Old Spitalfields Market, 10a Lamb St, E1 6EA. Tube: Liverpool St.
Given that Chanukah is a celebration of oil, then the least we can do is eat deep-fried food to celebrate. Kosher bakery Carmelli has been frying seasonal treats for 30 years now, but their array of doughnuts is still super-fresh.
Why kids will love it: Even if you’re not lighting eight candles you may eat eight doughnuts. 126-128 Golders Green Rd, NW11 8HB. Tube: Golders Green.
Claim a seat in this world-famous pâtissier’s London branch to tackle this double cream puff. Traditionally the pastry represents a nun, but it’s been dressed-up as jolly old Saint Nick for December.
Why kids will love it The filling is a milk-and-cookie-flavour ganache. 17-21 Elizabeth St, SW1W 9RP. Tube: Victoria.
The festive array on Fortnum & Mason’s gorgeous ground floor boasts some of the finest golden coins this side of Gringotts.
Why kids will love it Any coins that make it home without melting can be used to bribe siblings. 181 Piccadilly, W1A 1ER. Tube: Piccadilly Circus.
The centrepiece of any Christmas Day is surely its lunch. Colourful vegetables glistening under lashings of gravy, chipolatas tucked snugly into bacon blankets and tender slices of the finest meat. Why keep it for special occasions when these guys do such a good job?
Why kids will love it This one is even better than Christmas dinner: no turkey! 11 Barley Mow Passage, W4 4PH. Tube: Chiswick Park.
Glühwein is out of bounds, but there are no age restrictions on sausages. A hefty bratwurst hot dog (covered in squiggles of bright yellow mustard if their young palates will allow it) gives a satisfyingly instantaneous feeling of roly-poly German Yuletide bonhomie.
Why kids will love it Herman’s adorable primary colour branding is practically child bait. 19 Villiers St, WC2N 6ND. Tube: Embankment.
Nothing screams snow-dusted, Northern Euro Christmas vibes like a hunk of warming gingerbread. And hark! The ’bread biscuits at super-cute café Jacob the Angel – in tree and seraph shapes – are as sweet as they come.
Why kids will love it They’re crunchy, chewy and subtly spiced – perfect for novice palates. 16½ Neal’s Yard, WC2H 9DP. Tube: Covent Garden.
In Denmark it’s traditional to share out a bowl of risalamande (almond rice pudding) on December 23. In it will lie a whole almond, and whoever finds it wins a marzipan pig. Which is kind of brilliant. At Scandi Kitchen, everyone’s a winner, no pudding luck required.
Why kids will love it Animal-shaped sugar? That’s instant success. 61 Great Titchfield St, W1W 7PP. Tube: Oxford Circus.
A pie is a treasure hunt in itself, really. Crunch through its crisp pastry protection to be rewarded with a warm, rich filling. Square Pie’s mini portions are just the right size for small palms.
Why kids will love it If they can’t decide between the four flavours, they might even have room for two. Westfield White City, W12 7GF. Tube: Shepherd’s Bush.
Don’t fancy cooking on December 25? Here are 52 London restaurants open on Christmas Day.Share the story