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11 places you need to go if you’re slutty for cheese

100 best dishes in London, androuet, special fondue
© Scott Chasserot

Cheese: your booty call, your fromage-with-benefits, your mozzarella fella.

Cheese will always be there for you, treating you sensually, tenderly, caerphilly.

You’re just a mixed-up good girl with one fatal weakness: a burning desire for the pressed curds of milk. And you don't give edam who knows it.

1) Raclette Brothers, various locations 

These brothers melt the hell out of a wheel of cheese.
Then use it to smother some lesser, non-cheese ingredients.

They’re popping up in Bermondsey at the moment – check their Twitter for all the details.

2) Androuet, Spitalfields

 

A video posted by Jessica Khor (@jessicakhor) on


Fondue – the cheesiest thing of all. Question: is it legit to dip cheese in fondue? Asking for a friend.

3) St. Moritz, Soho

 

A photo posted by Sam Kelm (@samkelm) on


With each morsel, as you consume the fondue, the fondue also consumes you, spiralling through the stars for ever, like that bit in ‘La La Land’.

4) Archie’s, Deptford

 

A photo posted by Archie's (@archiesbarldn) on


This exotic dish is known as ‘queso fundido’.
(That’s some sexy foreign words for ‘melted cheese’)
Cheese is the international language. The language of love.

5) The Cheese Truck, various locations

 

A photo posted by The Cheese Truck (@thecheesetruck) on


Will you just LOOK AT THE SIZE OF THIS SANDWICH. Sweet Lord, have mercy. (Also, they’re opening a permanent location in Camden in February.) 

6) Grill My Cheese, Leather Lane


GMC sometimes grill rainbow toasties, because why not? And because they’re roguish bad boys who don’t follow society’s rules, they’ll also be like ‘fuck it’ and put mac ‘n’ cheese in a cheese toastie. Cheese in thrilling, dangerous new formats.

 


Talking of which...

7) The Mac Factory, Camden

 

A video posted by IMSHTUFFED (@imshtuffed) on


Macaroni, and maybe sautéed mushrooms, or chorizo, or truffle oil, garlic, or onions, or croutons... and your true love, cheese. 

8) Hawksmoor, across London

 

A photo posted by Hawksmoor (@hawksmoorrestaurants) on


Sure, Hawksmoor’s mac ‘n’ cheese is intended as a side dish – so just order three of them, add a bottle of wine, and SHAZAM! A classy dinner for one. (Let’s face it, by this point your lust for cheese has become an addiction driving away most of your friends and loved ones. Cheese is a jealous lover.)

9) La Fromagerie, Marylebone

 

A photo posted by Lucy Fredericks (@lucyfredericks) on


‘My desires are unconventional.’ ‘So show me.’ La Fromagerie's Black Room of Cheese, your own personal Red Room of Pain. But, y’know, with cheese.

10) Cheeses of Muswell Hill, Muswell Hill


Literally London’s favourite shop in our Love London Awards.

Their success is a testament to what happens when you turn your passion into your profession.

This could be you if you had your life on track, but there is some concern your ceaseless need for cheese will spiral into a gooey yellow life disaster leaving you crouched behind a bin licking the insides of discarded Babybel containers, while passing schoolkids call you ‘Cheese Lady’, and you shriek ‘THAT’S MRS CHEESE TO YOU!' because cheese, in your gouda-addled mind, has become your life partner. We’re all here for you.

11) Walluc, Shoreditch

 

A photo posted by hollynadowning (@hollynadowning) on


But until that day comes, there’s still fondue.

And finally, a gratuitous video montage of London‘s hottest cheese doing its sexy melty thang.

 
London’s fittest melting cheese

London’s sexiest melting cheese is guaranteed to get you hot under the collar...

Posted by Time Out London on Monday, 30 January 2017

 

 

More of that sweet cheese goodness:

🧀 Seven decent cheeseboards in London
🧀 Your favourite mac 'n' cheese in London
🧀 Five epic stiltons from London's cheese shops
🧀 Ten of the best cheese toasties in London

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Comments

4 comments
Matt B

What about Rippon Cheese in Victoria/Pimlico? A splendid estabilshment. https://ripponcheeselondon.com


Every Christmas I keep a record of the different cheeses I eat between about December 20 and January 2. Average is 18.

Lekha N tastemaker

This cheese guide would not be complete without Pistachio and Pickle's epic three-cheese toasties in Angel! Some swear by their 'purist' version for £5, but my favourite is the seasonal chilli jam 'with a kick' version for 50p more. They also have a finely stocked cheese counter with complementary cracker and chutney selections. Absolute cheese heaven!

Dan P

The cheese selection at Whole Foods Market at Piccadilly Circus is amazing.  

Hugh

Good list. Strange seeing a round-up without Kappacasein's Borough Market sarnies/raclette .